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Weekend warrior / Shade tree mechanics rules and mysteries. Please add you own.

1. When wrenching on your car, screws, nuts, and or bolts will either leave your work area through some space time continuum or multiply when you are not around. We have all tried different solution from magnetic trays, coffee cans, even labeled baggies. Sorry to report this does not work.

2. 10mm sockets don’t follow laws of science. They will create a micro black hole leave this universe, sometimes even taking other nearby tools or parts with them. This can take only a split second.

3. Metric sockets and wrenches can change sizes even place of origin. My metic sockets spent so much time in America they are changing to SAE. I now have two 7/16 sockets and no 10mm

3. The screws, nuts, and bolts you find at the edge of you driveway in a flower bed or grass do not fit anything you own. This can be true for randomly found screws and bolts in your garage too.

4. If the part your wrenching on came off nice and easy, the new part will be a complete pain in the bumper to put back on, or just wont fit.

5. The push in type fasteners (think fan shroud) will never come out in a condition you can use them again and the auto parts store only sell 20 types that don’t fit any vehicle ever made.

6. Any tool can randomly disappear and reappear in the very spot you left it. Sometimes it can take minutes, hours, or days for the tools to reappear. Beer seems to make this happen more often and speed up the reappearance. This does not apply to 10mm sockets, see rule #2

7. The cosmos knows what tool you need and makes sure it is the only one you can’t find.

8. Working on cars/trucks/Jeeps is the only activity that we: curse in anger, throw stuff, injure ourselves, and swear we are enjoying ourselves.

Correction, Wrenching or being a Bengals or Browns fan.

9. If you replace a part and test it before installing it , it will work. Once final re-assembly is complete, it won’t work and you will have start over.

10. ??? What’s your 10, or 10-15?
 

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11. no matter what direction is straight down (gravity), sand/dirt/rust will fall into your eyes from every angle.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
View attachment 126607
Weekend warrior / Shade tree mechanics rules and mysteries. Please add you own.

1. When wrenching on your car, screws, nuts, and or bolts will either leave your work area through some space time continuum or multiply when you are not around. We have all tried different solution from magnetic trays, coffee cans, even labeled baggies. Sorry to report this does not work.

2. 10mm sockets don’t follow laws of science. They will create a micro black hole leave this universe, sometimes even taking other nearby tools or parts with them. This can take only a split second.

3. Metric sockets and wrenches can change sizes even place of origin. My metic sockets spent so much time in America they are changing to SAE. I now have two 7/16 sockets and no 10mm

3. The screws, nuts, and bolts you find at the edge of you driveway in a flower bed or grass do not fit anything you own. This can be true for randomly found screws and bolts in your garage too.

4. If the part your wrenching on came off nice and easy, the new part will be a complete pain in the bumper to put back on, or just wont fit.

5. The push in type fasteners (think fan shroud) will never come out in a condition you can use them again and the auto parts store only sell 20 types that don’t fit any vehicle ever made.

6. Any tool can randomly disappear and reappear in the very spot you left it. Sometimes it can take minutes, hours, or days for the tools to reappear. Beer seems to make this happen more often and speed up the reappearance. This does not apply to 10mm sockets, see rule #2

7. The cosmos knows what tool you need and makes sure it is the only one you can’t find.

8. Working on cars/trucks/Jeeps is the only activity that we: curse in anger, throw stuff, injure ourselves, and swear we are enjoying ourselves.

Correction, Wrenching or being a Bengals or Browns fan.

9. If you replace a part and test it before installing it , it will work. Once final re-assembly is complete, it won’t work and you will have start over.

10. ??? What’s your 10, or 10-15?
14. -Your prediction on how long a job will take is always wrong. A 1 hour job can take 3 days, 2 runs to the pats store and three 6 packs of cold ones. A 4 hour job may end up finished in an hour and a half. (Still three 6 packs)
 

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For each time the instructions say "disconnect connector X" add 2 hours to the time estimate.
 

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15. - Never ever let anyone help you unless it is to pass tools to you or hold a part. If the other person puts a tool on your vehicle, double, triple, even quadruple check what they did... then break their hand and say "NO!"
 

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15. - Never ever let anyone help you unless it is to pass tools to you or hold a part. If the other person puts a tool on your vehicle, double, triple, even quadruple check what they did... then break their hand and say "NO!"
Best use of a helper is to get and hand you Beer, Burger King and run to the part store. Once the food and Bev is dropped off, send them to the parts store weather you need anything or not.
 

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Rest assured that the random baggie of bolts setting in your tool box for the last 3 years will never be used or needed. Until the day after the trash company picks up the cans that you threw it in it while saying "haven't needed it yet so guess i will throw it out".

Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk
 

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Save everything until you sell the vehicle.

When you have sold the vehicle don’t try to sell anything just throw it away.


If you can see butt connector connections hanging from anywhere while standing it the drivers doorway refuse the job.

Never tell anyone you wrench on your own cars.

Make real good friends with all the parts stores in town, then move it back to the next set of towns closest. You need these folks on your side.

If it’s electrical buy OEM, the angry pixies get out of joint when it’s not exactly the same.

If your buying one of something, buy two.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
 
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